I fail to understand what went into my configuration when the assembly was being carried out somewhere up there. Too many parts to deliberate, even more parts to execute the deliberation but somehow 'will' is not auto-attributed to every deliberated execution that I plan. No, for His sake don’t mix it with lack of will as that equals inertia (read lethargy) which is an altogether different stratum. I intend to portray my will as a selective one. It chooses its own gasp of glory and until then lies aloft, silently.
If you are still reading this then you must be the intended recipient of this post else as I just now realised, if left to me, I would have had left it after first 5 words. Anyways, the context here was my enviable consistency in being so indisciplined when it comes to writing Blogs. Thanks for the adulation for above statement but I would rather love to be writing and posting if not much then atleast as frequent as the number of useful business conf calls you do in a month. Hope that settles it for now. Any further argument may have to be validated against proofs.
Switch! Back to Mumbai after appx 4 years. It was something that was bound to occur, irrespective of how I was planning for or against it. It’s a city I love & despise the most in this whole damn world and I cannot explain either ways so please leave it as stated. Having said that, this city is undoubtedly the one that makes me learn the value of relationships; by demonstrating an absolute individual characteristics and persona.
'Individuals multiplied' is what I'd term it to be. It’s a place that makes you feel free, as if I you are liable as well as empowered to drive my own destiny; and on the other hand it challenges your character buildup and thinking to the extremes, like nothing else. Believe that’s precisely why I like it so much. It’s one’s own shell-city wherein he can stay in a bubble but at times allow this bubble to merge with another passing bubble and after a conversation/association comfortable to buoyancy of both, automatically detach himself in search of another passing bubble.
Next time if you happen to meet the known bubble, you may recollect the fun you had, again attach for a while and then again invariably detach and waive off. Having said that, it’s a choice, yet again of the bubble to stay a bubble that ways all his life or form a droplet with the adjacent bubble and descend to ground. Choice again as I said!!!
Now that I am here, I can again see the Maxim city in above light. There are two specific sets of bubbles that intrigue me the most or you may read as those to whom I can directly relate to. They also apparently are intertwined. One sort is one big random bubble which floats freely, damn cares but still is concerned huge lot about those bubbles that chose to find affinity with it. Such sub-bubbles were also those who stick with the master bubble proactively and help it not descend by not turning it into a droplet. This they achieve by maintaining distant proximity so that affinity is not lost and submerge also doesn’t happen. This is an arrangement most convenient for most free floating bubbles. The pre-condition again is that the master bubble got to be immensely concerned about well being of associated bubbles. If that’s not there then compulsive detachment of forced submerge happens which takes it down anyways. Not a condition any bubble would prefer to solicit.
There is another set of bubble which is nice but dangerous. This is typically found in the cases wherein the sub-bubble and primary bubble get attached to each other through affinity that is indefinable by any relative logic. It’s kind of an attraction that is hard to shrug off but even more difficult to sustain. If you try to shrug it off, then you may also feel like losing some of your own elements in the process which is painful. However if you choose to let it stay, it rules over all the subjects of mind and matter, thus rendering irrationality of thoughts and streaks. This is a dangerous standpoint and should be catered to in a manner which is considerate as well as judicious. However it seldom does happen this way and ends up either bursting the prime-bubble due to surface tension or disfigurement of sub-bubble due to extra affinity. Loss is mutual but goes heavy against love & tenderness. Caution is the word !!!
Having said that, got to remember that whether as bubble or as droplets, the agenda is to ensure that all the participant bubbles stay safe from infections that may creep in from external agents and disturbances. There are enough infections around but so is the propensity to Love. What needs to be ensured is that bubbles don't run out of love as till the time love is there, sustenance will not be a challenge. A bit of affection, an assurance of proximity and life will trail smoothly.
In the above I have tried my level best to complicate the most simple of the matters however guess that’s how all of us live our lives. They say complications ruin lives; I say they don’t ruin lives. Complications just give directions to your otherwise monotonous, unidirectional (read un-directional) lives. We just need to ensure that we are Cognizant of ourbubbles and our falls.
कहते हैं सब सर्वशक्तिमान अन्तर्यामी भगवान् हो तुम,
हर कण में, हर क्षण में, हर ह्रदय मैं विद्यमान हो तुम,
निवासित हो गर सृष्टि की हर एक रचना में,
फिर क्यूँ हमारे आत्मबल के क्षय से अनजान हो तुम ...
अश्रु - धारा की जगह रक्त झरता है हर कोर से,
पाप-छल का साम्राज्य है पुण्य - रुपी आकाश पे,
ये पावन नदियाँ अब जल नहीं कपट बहाया करती हैं,
और किरणें भी प्रकाश नहीं गहनतम तम बिखराया करती हैं,
नहीं कर सकते प्रदान नवालोक , कहलाते क्यूँ महान हो तुम ...
निवासित हो गर ...........
दिक्पाल दिशाओं के थर्राते हैं पाप के अंतर्नाद से,
रो उठते हैं पाषाण भी मानव ह्रदय के विषाद से,
छलनी करके रख देते हैं, अपनों के ही प्रपंच बाण,
असत्य के हाथों मैं रहती न्याय की सर्वोच्च कृपान,
गर नहीं सत्य के पाल, कहलाते क्यूँ सत्यवान हो तुम,
निवासित हो गर ...........
परीक्षा ना लो सब्र की हमारी, ' मनु ' से पाया है हमने धीर,
है संबल इतना कि सह जाएँ , हर विपदा के तीश्नतम तीर,
ला सकते हैं भूडोल, अपनी एक हुंकार से,
भेद सकते हैं पर्वत का सीना अपनी सत्य कटार से
मत भूलो रह चुके हो, इसी कुल कि संतान तुम,
निवासित हो गर ...........
Since nothing per-se is oozing out from the vents of my semi-dysfunctional neurological HEAD-set, posting a recent discussion on Face Book profile. It had that ol’ sense of intellectual brainstorming and repercussion analysis, so quite liked it[For first time readers,when I say ol' and am happy about it,please take it to be of HBTI era ;-) ] ... Random but worth reading.
Background:Center’s admission to demands of a separate state down South. Obviously other politicos to follow!!!
Characters (some of them!) – Anand Sahu (HSBC), Vikash Sinha, Nikhil Anand, Nitin Srivastava,(HBTI Kanpur) and Yours Truly !
Mohit ChauhanTelangana fallout: Maya wants UP into 3...Jaswant for Gorkhaland...Me for Chauhanangana !!! Very soon India which is everybody's 1 democracy will become 1 democracy for each one of us !!!
Anand Sahu: Kam se kam koi reservation nahi hoga na koi minority hogi ‘coz everybody would be running his own demo. Some great person has said – ‘Democracy is the worst form of governance..in democracy you don’t get what you elect but you get what you deserve’..If Gandhi had a right to endorse the partition, rest everybody is forbidden. So just enjoy world’s biggest Democracy..
Mohit Chauhan : I couldn’t agree more Anand san !!! Waise bhi we Indians are known to be good learners..and we learnt damn well when British taught us Divide and Rule..We love it still !!!
Anand Sahu : Mohit with all due respect to your thought and wishes which would be mine too, would like you to get placed your facts correct. There is a difference between the governance policy and phrases passed to generations. Post Asoka it was only East India company which governed the biggest piece of this sub continent under one flag. even greater than Chandragupta Maurya II and Akbar. post that I have only seen divisions and divisions. pls let me know any reunions in this land. we guys definitely love to get divided and be ruled and ruled by others.. Are leaders are truly good learners. They know very well if you can’t have the entire pie of state in your mouth, then bite it into pieces. Result few more Swiss account holders like Siren and Kodas.
Mohit Chauhan : Absolutely agree with you Anand San !!! That’s what I meant when I said we are good learners. Any great ruler who ruled over any part of the world always thought of one unified world, whether it is Napoleon,Alexander,Chandragupta - II,Babur,Akbar or whoever ‘Coz they always knew that the administration works the best that ways, resources to distribute simply..But now it all is just done with coz as u rightly said, our politicos just know that pie is what they can best manage/plunder and harassedly exploit coz they just simply cant be role leaders..Period !!! EIC just knew how to place bets right and then they had patience..Loads of it..nobody waits for 150 years to invest in future resources. It did.
Nikhil Anand : As per my understanding and opinion this kind of disintegration is not necessarily bad. Like take example of Uttaranchal, ppl there were furious over many years before the evolution of new state. The economic contribution of Uttaranchal (Hyd. Elec. Pow. & tourism) in UP was a handsome chunk and they were getting peanuts in return for development. Same may have been the case with Telangana. This was the reason of their anger and it happens when ppl are ignored and polarized development occurs. Now u can see the amazing industrial growth thus employment and per capita income there. What happens with a business organization when it grows in market? U need to increase manpower, even in HR. Similarly if the govt. administration unable to match the work demand caused by growth and development, it needs to expand or increase its efficiency. We all know latter can't increase as all intellects including me (may be overrated) sit outside. So there are positive things also associated with the division. But it should be done in peaceful manner. Not on the roads burning the buses, damaging public property.
Nitin Srivastava : Thanks to Mohit for giving a brilliant idea for a new Dil Se cartoon. have a look at it - www.dilsecartoons.com . I don't completely disagree with Nikhil. I have seen Uttaranchal before the division and after the division..there is a BIG difference. BUT that positive difference was short lived..people are now again agitating..now the Paharis and Tarai people are fighting for power in the state. The state Govt. has done just 5% of what was expected to be done in terms of Tourism, Hydel Elect production and development in remote areas. Even if you go to past Mussourie and Dhanaulti..you will find few villages which are still waiting for proper electricity connections and availability. A state which has maximum potential to generate Hydel Electricity if cannot distribute and provide it to its people, how in this world they are going to sell it and earn money. Divisions have good impact only if people who are going to govern those smaller chunks are ready to focus on the growth and development. BUT the problem is these vampires are there to suck the blood of the masses and do nothing else. As far as Telangana is concerned, I would say, this division was inevitable. I remember when I was in Hyderabad and we planned a trip to Vizag. The villages we passed through in between have no infrastructure support, Govt is happy just to show off Hyderabad on world map. The number of naxalites in AP is so high because of this attitude of Govt. Why does not anything like burning Govt vehicles, jamming streets happen in US-because everyone is busy and working. Govt provides them employment opportunities. The data released every month about number of ppl unemployed is 5lac or less in US and what our Govt does; they simply target to create 1 lac jobs in next 2 years. These bunches of shits don't even target something higher.
Vikash Kumar Sinha : Indians need to unite, take lesson from Europe. After having separate countries, now they are trying to forge European Union where free movement of people is not only helping businesses but also the life of common people in the associated countries. Euro is valued better than US dollar and is considered to be a safe currency. The only thing India needs is unification and by pushing differences of religion, region or caste will push the country on the backward path. People should understand that the bloody politicians are playing with the emotions of the common man to serve their own bloody means. The philosophy of MNS and the politics played on dividing states both are having the same motive of dividing people and gaining power. Wake up India and wake up Indians. I do not justify any reason for division of states. the MPLAD fund and MLA funds have millions of rupees. why the hell the people are not voting for the right person who utilizes these funds properly. I have heard planning commission head Montek Singh Ahluwalia accepting on national television that the situation has improved from Rajiv Gandhi’s time and now, around 50 paisa is utilized properly for every rupee sanctioned by the government and he was proud of it--- It simply means that the budgeting of the government for development plans do not reach the ground level. I have heard backward politics played by politicians with respect to education policy. BJP governments in many states want the local language to be promoted by having medium of instruction in local language for primary education. Come on, the kid of every filthy rich politician in India goes to English medium schools and when it comes to higher education poor people specially studying in their local language find it tough. Society and culture do change with times. India of Humayun Kabir is a land of fusion of cultures. it has been there for centuries and by studying in English medium we do not stop believing in India or Indians or local language or culture.. the politicians want the high status not only for them but for their kids as well, they are deluding us..we should not trap ourselves in their mean designs. China is far ahead of India in building infrastructure because of its centralized system.. why can´t people in India get it done by centralized government bodies. the Cauvery water row, the power selling problems within states.. come on. India needs a centralized infrastructure building.. the state governments fight and it is the people who loose in the end
Anand Sahu : Vikash very true..this shows why at a time they governed the world for 300 years..and now even..they dominate ( US and Australia is populated at coasts only and done mainly by britishers)..Nitin / Nikhil..I don’t blame you..all would request to revisit the basic of admin , micro and macro eco. The basics are always same. Small units are always good for big projects but to be controlled by one leader. Here what you talk about is something else. The only parted state did some good for short term was due to natural source / resources available there. Post getting it drained them are back to square one. There is nothing great they did on admin and leadership.
Mohit Chauhan : Hey !!! I think the discussion is going in a very positive direction..I think every country is different so is the socio economic paradigm it works in..India unfortunately is a melting pot of ideologies if not culture alone..And that’s the issue. Ideologies bring along ego and inapt notions about oneself..That’s happening here too. I agree a bit with Nikhil when he says about better management but then at what cost..My home, even if better managed in nuclear fashion, would certainly be much better off for my next generation if everybody is together..Maybe I am wrong but that my hypothesis.. And ofc,great stuff again Nitin !
Anand Sahu : Yes Nitin has done excellent job..nice site too..Mohit you are absolutley correct. also even if you do well today does'nt means you should get parted from your brother and family who would not be doing as good as you "Today" just to ensure a better luxury in terms of increased family disposal income. What about the growth for tomorrow and social security a macro level. How far the next generation will sustain.
Vikash Kumar Sinha : I couldn´t agree more to Anand and Mohit.. I have the same vision of shared future for Indians as Mohit talks of in his last sentence. I hope despite these differences of culture and ideologies, we all Indians will work together with honesty, enthusiasm and optimism to achieve this.
Anand Sahu : Vikash..everybody is doing the same ..at least everybody feels so..but in which direction..let me explain you in a simple manner. Hundred workers of very different linguistic skills, religion, culture and ideologies are laying bricks to construct a wall with full honesty, enthusiasm and optimism. Tell me which worker will tell the wall being built is correct, as required and as per norms. Construction of wall will have noting correlated with culture and ideologies and religion of workers. To phir har baar last mein iska raag kyon alaapte hain HUM LOG.. we are discussing leadership, foresight and admin failures being the main coz of daily arising demands of separatism and reservations..and you are putting stress on culture, ideologies, Indians will work together with honesty, enthusiasm and optimism ..matlab pichle 60 years nahi kar rahe..ya mohit saab roj 12.00 noon ko so ke jagte hai aur mein rof faaltu hota hoon.
Vikash Kumar Sinha : Anand. last sixty years, Indians have concentrated more on I and my family [ though my caste (in the whole country, more prominent as a political plank after Mandal Commission) and my region(in some developed parts of the country) philosophies were there which were capitalized on well by the politicians and at times by antisocial elements..]The difference between India and "the most hated neighbor of India" has been that this difference of culture, religion and region has contributed to a democratic thought despite the divided attitude of people who considered the national unity despite their ideological differences.. we have been like a ball dropped on the slope of time..moving and gathering momentum.. We have fared well because of the survival of democracy.. (Other wise fundamentalist forces would have made us weak as they have done in our neighboring country) Now I see a difference of attitude in the new generation.. yet I see a lot of educated people going in for MNS and BJPs hardcore decade old philosophy.. Our education system makes us "honest parrots" and despite the rise in income and education levels, I see all Indians including me lacking in values and ethics..and this is why we pay to corrupt politicians and clerks in government offices to get our work done (In corruption index India has still been downgraded.. there has been a rise in corruption) We have been taught in our schools "mera desh mahan" though truck drivers also know "100 main 99 baimaan"---Take another scenario.. with how many neighbors, India is having good relations.. Going closer to USA or still trying to be closer to Russia.. at least I do not see where are we heading in our international diplomacy.If we see the current situation of India struggling with J&K, Northeast problems and Naxalism (find out the percentage of Indian region affected by separatist movements, believe me it is scary.. we are sitting on a satchel charge), we will find that it is not exactly admin failures that have contributed to such scenarios..these are the incognito behind a more destructive designs.. It is the more fundamental shift in the ideology of common man misguided by a few who do not want to see India united because it is in their interest of future to gain power.. Actually asking for a separate state is OK to some extent but again it will make a potential problem of future.. Politicians are trying to gain more power.. Tell me Bihar and Orissa were carved out of Bengal long back still the region remains backward.. why despite being separated from Bihar, Jharkhand is not doing well.. TRS sold its ideology to gain power in Andhra after winning a good number of seats previously..Still embryonic in terms of development of cohesive forces that bind the country, India is actually not doing well despite media hype..(I have cited these to make you realize that we r not doing “very well” despite our media hype, the difference in income and disparity is poised to grow and a youth in the rural undeveloped area is definitely going to fight for getting more facilities.. in fact he is the potential catch for people who want separatist movements) It is not the politicians or a failure of bureaucrats.. It has been the failure of Indians.. In democracy.. you get what you vote for.... If we do not wake up to these challenges now and do not see the problem in its entirety, we will definitely face difficulties..Actually the very strength of democracy (diversity of culture and region and religion) of our past is making our future bleak..Look, now because of underdevelopment, people are asking for a separate state and are being provoked by a few.. Once after they get the state and again the development doesn´t happen.. they will ask for a separate country.. you know why? Because they r misled by a few... those few they choose first didn´t deliver and then another few forced them to have a separate state.. and again if they do not deliver.. another few will fuel them to have a separate country.. It is not the failure of leadership.. it is not the admin failure.. It is we.. we greedy educated people knowingly or unknowingly force government to invest more on urban regions so that we have better life.. we all were selfish, still are (as I have quoted in my first line as well) and this is what we need to change.. we need to change ourselves.. the system will change by itself. The underlying problem is not the admin failure. The strength of India is its diversity which becomes a threat of we don’t understand it. We need more homogeneous society and that is where I supported Mohit and shared his idea of united India.. Can we bring an all inclusive solution and work on it (action is important.. I know my writing is not going to change anything)
Mohit Chauhan : Great thoughts Anand,Vikash,Nikhil,Nitin.I guess we all share one common idea at the end of the day !! One unified Country.Isnt' it ? The issue is that as Vikash rightly said,we are still are being misled by few politicos. It’s basic to understand that they are PROFESSIONALS and not novices. They know what works best for THEM.I am sorry to say but how many of us stick to our companies coz we just cant stop loving them..I am sure not many. Most of us including me prioritize their basics first;family,commerce,time..Even politicos do the same..Totally..Idealistic governance has ceased existence in our colleges and institutions, leave government.Vikash/Nitin - Remember the way we used to work for our college fests and all. What was the motive..We used to love our college like anything? I never did..I just loved the idea of contributing to whomever,peers,seniors,buddies..But guess that made us achieve great stuffs and is still keeping us live..Nitin has become entrepreneurial,Vikash is pursuing his dream,I still have that fire somewhere,intact..Why - 'coz we want to contribute, still..Issue is, politicos have different priorities..because after all they too are the common man origin who have come up the ladder and have surpassed many others in the race to stardom (!)Now it’s difficult to let go..This state issue - Mayawati knows that another term in UP is impossible for her party, thus separate state. Similarly for AP,WB,even Bihar,UA,NE..It’s all selfish exercise though in some cases it might prove out to be good, the end results are always disastrous..Ask merit hurts to tell people from other state that UA was where I spent best of my school breaks..and the territory that I love the most..But it was not a separate state then..I am just a conservative..I hate changes, more so when they are driven by selfish motives..Which truly is the case..
I seriously don’t know when will I get regular at blogging. This time it’s been over 6 months I scribbled on this page. Wierdo!!!
It reminds me of BR Sharma Sir who probably is the only teacher who has left an indelible impression on my mind. Out of all his sudden spurts of wisdom, the one that has stuck with me was exclusively eloquated to me during a 0530 AM December 1998 winter morning one-on-one. I guess I was not able to focus on my goal or probably he saw me in some kind of’ dilemma I am not sure but it was roughly on the same lines and he was corollarily not in a position to teach due to last night’s high. I guess he just somehow saw it on my face like always and told me to come on in and sit. Then he just said,yeah tell me watz' troubling you and I just roughly told him all I could gather out of nonsensical stuffs going on in my mind regarding my career, life whatever. At the end of it he said – MOHIT,ALWAYS REMEMBER TO KEEP ATLEAST ONE ACTIVITY CONSTANT IN YOUR LIFE AT ANY GIVEN POINT OF TIME….ONE FIXED FOCAL POINT & YOUR ENTIRE LIFE WILL JUST AUTOMATICALLY ADJUST ITSELF IN THE SURROUNDING AXES ... For a minute I was just quiet, letting it sink deeper not 'coz I had understood all that it meant but coz I trusted his advice more than body else's. And since then I had been following that piece till the end of HBTI through the year of Job-quitting and preparation and it worked all the time. I wouldn’t divulge what was it that I made a constant as it would appear silly to most of you but it always worked perfectly for me. Somehow !!!
But then it all just went into disarray at MBA and later at job where the only measured constant was Entropy. Randomness of thoughts, routines, wants, ambitions, decisions and Life!!! There were days when I was so damn perfectionist in all that I did and now 6 years hence I just halfheartedly attempt at seeking perfection and then just let go. of it .Is it 'coz I have moved up & forth in life or is it because I have gained, what they call MATURITY. But I don’t think its maturity actually. The decisions that I am taking now, the advice I render now is not as involved as they were then. And if it is maturity only, then it has unfortunately given me a non-sensical trait of selectively reacting to things. It is self-restraining and hinders growth; of personality, of acumen and I am a living testimony. I might have grown professionally over the years and have gained ‘Education’ also but at the end of the day is that all just surfacial, non-satisfying illusionary experience. Infact I am sure many of the readers who know me personally would be surprised to know it, but two of the personality traits that have stuck with me in past 3 years are introvert and non-aggressive(read passive !) to the extremes. I mean that’s so weird. Those were always my antonyms. Guess that’s what they call maturity. Huh!!!
Anyways, targets for the week !!! One, mulling over the thing that could be my NEW constant now, second; Surviving through the Half marathon on Sunday and third; experiencing Mumbai trip as a change factor in life. Life is nice to those who treat it nicely.Ain't it? J Keep watching this space for more on it !!! Till then ,so long !!!
So, again the talk of the season is General Elections-2009!!! Elections that ideally should come in every 5 years, fortunately though! Over 1000 crore INR was spent on GE 2004 and average inflation till last week was around 5.25 %.Rest is mathematics. Yes indeed that figure is an underestimation as it is an official record figure and we all know how the records are generated. But that is not the crux of this discussion. The point I wanted to make was, are we as an educated section of the populace, acting as an active part of the process or are we a dormant specie in this herd-like 1 month long fanfare. Are we amongst those who have the will to change the system or are we those who just have an opine and no will no substance. Are we an Individual in practice.
Just a line of thought, don’t we check for the record of even a help we keep at our homes. If that is so, do we actually do enough check on the candidates we wana vote for. Do we go online and check for all the candidates who are canvassing in our constituency or we just vote for a party for it being the most vigorous/aggressive of all. Do we vote basis our research and not presumptions? Do we see merit in electing the right person.Thats my thought process? In the coming days you would come across campaigns/canvassings/melodramas/inflammatory speeches/slogans and every damn thing your senses can and cannot imagine but are you able to see through the maze and use your education and conscience as the decision making tool.Thats' critical!!!
This time, try and do every damn bit of research you wana do on all the candidates and then take a stand irrespective of party/caste/creed/celeb status. But in case you are not able to convince yourself to vote for any candidate just go out on the election date and use Section 49-0 which says that - a person can go to the polling booth, confirm his identity, get his finger marked and convey the presiding election officer that he doesn't want to vote anyone.Implications;if a candidate wins, say by 100 votes, and that particular ward has received "49-O" votes more than 100, then that polling will be cancelled and will have to be re-polled. Not only that, but the candidature of the contestants will be removed and they cannot contest the re-polling, since people had already expressed their decision on them. This would atleast bring fear into parties and hence look for genuine candidates for their parties for election.
The only message I wana communicate is that no matter what, this election, just go out and participate because this is the only way we can repay back to this beautiful sovereign democratic republic called India.
In case you need assistance on the election process/candidate profile etc, please find below a link on the election details. Kindly use such tools extensively.
Run Delhi Run!!! And it did ! And that too with an elance, fervor. This time around I made sure that no alumni meet or any such excuse prohibit me from running. Surely I ran and so did 20000+ odd people from all cadres, class and upbringings. As the Airtel ad was yelling out during every commercial break, Remember the joy of Running, I enjoyed every bit of it. Not because I am a die hard fitness freak but to admit the least, I just wanted to tire myself, get exhausted, drenched, drained.Wanted to experience the physical exertion till the time it just overpowers every other form of fatigue; professional, psychological, moral.And it did, but not for long.100 odd minutes and life was back on routine. So much I wish that the fatigue stays with me,forever,wishful huh !!!
While running I was pondering over a couple of things which although do not matter much to me or are applicable to me, have indirect repercussions on my psyche. I was wondering whether if what we do comes back to us in this life only. I was wondering if I am actually no longer the person I once was, not even a shadow, blip. I was wondering if I need to just get back to my thinking ladder and give life one more shot and see if some things could be bettered, won over. Know what, I got my answer by the evening .Life has a strange way of taking vengeance. It waits for the prey, chooses the best weapon and then strikes on its morale, confidence with a deadly fervor and immediately makes a kill. In most of the cases it chooses your loved ones as the weapons. Probably in all cases.Mabe coz it knows that you are vulnerable to them or mabe coz it knows that in such cases your chances of recuperating are meagre.Whichever way, this is how it is.Strange, on your face and full of drama; all at the same time.Koi nahin, everybody has a right to Live and us as an individual have neither a say nor prowess to dictate terms. Not even to …anybody...
So, I just ran. And I still am running. Dunno towards the life or straight away from it. But running I am because that’s what keeps me charged and helps me lose track of wilderness in my mind. If I am static, the mind is not and the battle just begins from where I had left it which is unfortunate, torturing.
Anyways, tomorrow, rather today (its 0045 hrs damn it!) is a new day. There are challenges at my workplace too but probably I just can attribute them on somebody else (wishful again! Just wondering when I last did that!) Whichever way, that’s another thing which happens every day again just for the heck of it and I again am running, in some direction my goodness!!! Yawn !!! Chalo,gotta’ go.Long night ahead and winters and life have longer nights though the days are valued more than in summers.
Just to make a point – Evolution is the most important fact of life because if you don’t evolve with time you might just be taken for granted by those whom you take a bit too seriously!!!
Whatever! I don't like the idea of not being called as a Male Chauvinist any more. I still am the same old Mocho who was just so very damn Chauvinist flag bearer to the very core of his inflated heart and sinking rationale. But what does it get to do with this post. Wait a minute.Oh of course; it has to do a lot with this post. This post is about my preferences; huh dirty minded; not sexual preferences damnn’t; my preference of Radio Stations. I mean ok, well, I am a perfect machoism personified substance but what does it gotta’ do with my liking MEOW 104.8 over any other frequency for that matter. Its just weird!
Talking about radio stations only, I just feel baffled and stupid hearing to the same songs over and again repeatedly till my nerves actually start defying the constraints of my brains and my ears cursing my lovely Swift for flaunting a 4 speaker music system. That’s why I like this channel; MEOW-104.8 or as Jaishree says - India's first 'm first Just for Women Radio station. Who is Jaishree???Oh ok, let me just take you through a small crash course of the same.
Jaishree and Mandy: Hosts of Meow Zindagi, a breakfast talk show. However I always feel that Roshi-Jaishree combi was deadlier than this one. Alas!!! Roshi only does Color Therapy now.
Seema :Morning Meow and Dial M for Meow .These are Priyanka’s fav sections as Seema plays oldies in these 2 shows
Ramaa and Manisha:Meow Matinee and Mumma Meow resp. I have heard the talk shows a couple of times and found them to be really educative.
Ginni: My favorite. RJ of Tu-Tu Meow-Meow which typically is an evening talk show in which both the sexes are allowed to call and chat. As she terms it to be a battle of sexes. It is conversant, intelligent and thought provoking. I find this lady a bit rude though but guess this is what steers the show well.
Divya and Kiran Bedi:Top Cat .As the name suggests, a very innovative use of Radio as an Information and Awareness Media. Very cool show.
Anil : The only male RJ of the station. Hosts again a talk show called Between the sheets which is in a way like Agony uncle for ladies. Its very interesting at times but depends.Dunno’…Indian audience u c.
In the nutshell I like the whole genesis of this station for the simple reason that it doesn’t rely on the same so called chartbusters being played on and on for hours for no particular reason. I actually am not a music buff at all and so get bored very easily. So its Meow for me.
Before I sign off, and also for the respite of guys who think I am a overt feminist now; huh;There are 4 other RJs whom I just luv to hear to for the plain ingenuity of content. These are “SUD” Sudarshan, “Khurafati” Nitin,”Radio ke Virus” Anant and Saurabh.
Target :: Again an overtly Democratized common man.
Reason :: To hit-bang on our national pride, our self confidence.
Ammunition :: Hatred,Jealousy.
Its probably been the blackest fortnight of my life.Never have I experienced the bout of emotions against terrorism , the way I was feeling this time. May be because this time I was a mere whisker off from the possibility of getting hit.But frankly speaking this is very unfortunate.Why does it always take a narrow escape for us to start appreciating life or to start hating the unnatural causes of death.Terrorism and extremism to name a few.Were we not facing such problems in Punjab and Kashmir for decades .Is it not something which is commonplace in Bihar and Jharkhand.Is it not a fear which millions of less fortunate BPLs face all the time. The fear of un-called-for Death.
Since past couple of weeks this particular thought has been crossing my mind like a whirlwind.Repatedly and every other impact greater than the last.What exactly are these guys trying to prove?What is it that they intend to achieve through such attacks? Do they wish to convey to us that they are some crusaders who want to bring a glorifying accolade to their organization/community or are they a part of the bunch which thinks that Indian democracy is too good and example of successful democracy than they can digest and live with.What exactly is the psyche? I mean planting so many explosives in the most crowded market place of National Capital needs very strong set of emotions and rationales. Nobody can just for the heck of it do it without being doubly sure of the very motive.I just don’t know.
On 13th September I was on my way back to Meerut.Got the news reg the blast in front of my office on my way only.By the time I reached home all the explosions had happened.I just was totally perturbed and wayward,not knowing whatz happening.Came out of my room to breath in fresh air when found this sleazy reptile gobbling up its prey.Could not help relate it with blasts.Is this not what is happening. every other day in the country.Are we, common man, not being fed to these bloody miscreants.Ain’t we just keeping our fingers crossed,praying that the next blast does not happen near our homes.But are we so nimble footed.I seriously don’t think so.I guess this is the high time we learn our lessons.This is the time we realize that life is not gonna’ be the same again and we need to be ultra cautious and attentive;proactive and generous.All at the same time.
I believe we all need to be tough and strong willed.We gotta prove our mettle to these bloody miscreants who seem to think that we Indians are morally impotent and democratically handicapped.This is the time to prove that democracy doesnot mean waiting for generating unanimous public opine.Its all about sculpting the public opine the way you think is righteous and correct.Its about manning Noah's ark towards the virtuos horizons.
So shall we !!! Shall we stop being अकेलेपेड़ोंकातूफ़ान !!!
It doesn't happen quite often that I come out of a movie and feel intellectually evoked. Guess that's 'coz I don't happen to see intelligent cinema any more or plays for that matter. This Saturday I had this pleasant types feeling after watching ROCK ON!!! No, the movie is no provoker kinda’ stuff or like that. It just made me think. Think about a fact which normally doesn’t cross my mind v freq... I was just wondering if all of us actually are doing what we wanted to do in our resp lives. Are we doing something which is keeping us happy, ‘coz we always wanted to pursue it or are we just flowing with this torrent called Life? Its open ended!
The other day this wonderful lady called Gini on Meow 104.8 FM was discussing a similar topic in her show. I was surprised to learn that not even a damn single soul said confidently that he/she is doing something that makes him/her happy. It was damn thought-provoking, disturbing and surprising; all at the same time. I am just wondering if a majority of population actually is feeling the same syndrome that I am feeling just now. If that is the case then it absolutely is very unfortunate. As bad as it could get!!!
Ok, for that matter am I doing what I had dreamt of??? Well, I don’t think so. My dreams always had a vocation somewhere else. Probably in the quarters of Administrative Services but then leave it. But what is more important is whether if I am enjoying to the fullest whatever I am doing at present which is Banking.
Banking as such was never my type of sector, neither is it something I would put my heart totally into. Guess I am doing it just ‘coz I want to survive. And this is one reason I am not able to extract the best out of me. I am just doing whatever is sufficiently enough to keep me going. Trust me, the moment I will develop a sense of belongingness to this sector, I would be an impossible chase. But how much time its’ gonna’ take, whether it is gonna happen or not. All these questions are dwindling unanswered. Cool hai yaar.Chill!
In any case, just back from Book Fair. After a very very very long time got so much involved with books, my first love. It was just so comforting, soothing in the company of literature, fiction, science, philosophy and History. I wanted to buy so many of them but with my budget could get hold of only a couple of Hindi lit and likewiz.Guess this is one thing that makes me happy...HeHeHe…Looking forward to build on my own library some day. May be very soon ;-)
Gotta’ retire to bed. Monday blues are already gripping me. What crap…It is gonna’ be a tough Monday. So many questions after a bad month .Hello Up there …SOS !!! :-(
Life, as I see is all about the turns you take. I have entered into numerous serious arguments over this belief more than a couple of times. In most cases, the conflict was life is not made up of turns only. Its’ also about a contemplated beginning, a pre-decided destination and an infinitesimally long road. I somehow could never agree for the reason that my life in particular has been crafted basis the turns I took in my life or the turns I was forced to take during the course. I mean philosophically the two rationales may seem alike but practically they are altogether different.
If I may take an example out of my life only, then I started out as another nobody who propelled off with a dream of joining armed forces like several other nobodies of my age. Even prepared like hell for RIMC Examination but could not appear in the same as due to some postal strike or something my application form never reached their offices. Back to datum, I then committed my heart to SainikSchool but the dream just lived out the life of a caterpillar. My run for IAS was wiped off by some uncontrolled personal issues in year ’00 and even the catch line of becoming the best Civil-ian (i.e. Civil Engg) in the country after having passed out from one of the best Engg Institutes was shown the reality mirror by one lovely corporate. I guess that was the day I took the last spontaneous decision of my life. Quitting two jobs within a span of 4 hours and return to home the very next day. That was probably the turn that I took because I had no faith in the road laid ahead for me by fate. Guess it has not been a decision that has gone way too haywire till date. Its’ not been a disaster at leastJ But post that day, I have never been able to gather strength to take decisions which are tough, hard hitting and trying. I have probably become a bit too over cautious. Guess that is ‘coz with maturity you start weighing stuffs and then decision making becomes an altogether different ball game. Although I don’t have any qualm or whatever but there are times when I actually miss my tensile strength to create a ripple in the envio.
Even today when I try to re-define the way I work, the biggest hindrance that comes is my loss of spontaneity, in terms of decisions in terms of actions. There are two traits in personality that I admire the most; one, to take a stand against the wind and two, to live upto the decision by giving it your best. I have been a person with these traits in the past and trust me, the outcomes might not be very rewarding in the beginning but the satisfaction and confidence you get is just immense.
I guess I have lost enough on personal and professional front due to losing track of all the turns my life needed and just kept on traveling aimlessly. Have recently started re-aligning everything. Just hope the milestones would have waited for me all the while. They ideally should have ‘coz they are my own milestones, of my own life Rite?
